A couple of weeks ago I did a post about personality tests and now I'm doing another one? I don't know about you, but when blog posts or articles get really long, I start skimming or don't finish them. Sorry, but it's true. I have to be invested to want to finish. I'm guessing a lot of people are like that, so I decided to split the article so I could share all that I want to share with you and keep the posts to a reasonable length :) Today's post is about maybe the most impactful personality test I've ever taken - Gretchen Rubin's The Four Tendencies. The premise of the test and the research behind it is that people respond to expectations differently. There are four "tendencies" people have when it comes to what they want to do (inner expectations) and what others want them to do (outer expectations).
The four types are: • “Upholders” respond readily to outer and inner expectations. They keep the work deadline, and the New Year’s resolution, fairly easily. • “Questioners” question all expectations; they’ll meet an expectation if they think it makes sense and meets their own inner standards — so they follow only inner expectations • “Obligers” meet outer expectations, but struggle to meet expectations they impose on themselves. An Obliger journalist has no trouble writing when he has an editor, colleagues, and deadlines, but struggles to write a novel in his free time. • “Rebels” resist all expectations, outer and inner alike. They want to do what they want, in their own way, and if you ask or tell them to do something, they’re likely to resist. (Read more here) I thrived in school. Anytime I had a deadline of "you need to do this by this day", or even just having books I needed to work through, I made a plan and got it done. When I graduated, it was hard to be the one giving myself assignments and deadlines. All throughout elementary and middle school at my church, I had memory work. I memorized verses and other things easily because I had a framework. Same goes for the year I did Bible quizzing. But now? I struggle to memorize Scripture. There was a time when I could not motivate myself to read and study my Bible. When I finally admitted it to my friends, they suggested we all read and discuss it together in a group chat and I started reading every day. Can you guess what tendency I have? :) I never consciously thought about why I had some things were easier at certain times. It wasn't like I stopped and thought, "Wow, you know, it was a lot easier to do this when I had accountability and now it's harder. I wonder why that is?". Nope, until I took this test, I didn't realize what was going on. Finding out my Obliger tendency was a game-changer!!! As I said in my previous post on personality, I don't take my "labels" as my identity or an excuse but I use the knowledge to improve! Having the Obliger tendency helps me know what I need. If I'm trying to start a new habit, odds are good I need some kind of external help. Maybe it's telling some friends that I want to read the Bible more. Just having that group had me reading and posting almost every day. Even if they weren't sharing their thoughts, I felt like I needed to show up. Sometimes, my planner is external obligation enough. I drink water because I track it in my planner. I used to journal every day and that was a self-motivated goal. But I know myself better now and, unless I want to do something a lot, I know I need external accountability and motivation to get it done. Knowing your tendency can relieve a lot of frustration of trying and failing. If I didn't know that I need that external push from another person holding me to something or a deadline that can't be moved, I'd try do to things and form habits and fail over and over again. Eventually, I'd just give up out of frustration. With knowing my Obliger tendency, I know how to go about doing something if I really want to do it. That's an important factor. When I decide I really want to buckle down and work on my story or edit videos or memorize Scripture, I know what I need to do to help me actually do it. So the fact that I haven't done that yet means that I don't really want to. (Ouch, that hurts a little bit, especially when it comes to memorizing Scripture). If you struggle with habits and goals and generally doing things you want or need to do, I'd highly recommend taking this test and finding out your tendency. Once you know it, you have a plan of attack on how to finally start succeeding! Is this new information to you or not? I'd love to hear what kinds of things you have found to help you start and stick to things!
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Hi! I'm Sarah!
I am a natural light portrait photographer. I've been taking photos since 2014 and would eat a smoothie from Tropical Smoothie Cafe for lunch everyday if I could. Thank you so much for stopping by. I blog about sessions, things I'm learning, stuff in my life, and information for YOU, my client. If you like what you see around the site, I'd love to work with you! I'd also love to connect with you on Instagram. I'm @sarah_jayne_photo :) Archives
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